1-69) Technicalities

This story’s events are preceded by the events here

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“Vampire council? WTF? The meatball knocked up and turned his wife, not waged war against humanity! I am gonna go talk some sense into him.”
“Blaine, stop, I told you this in confidence. Ezio would not want you to fight his battles for him.”
“A) I don’t really give a shit what Ezio wants and B) I am not fighting battles, I am talking to a friend who seems to have gotten a bit carried away with his new title. Oh, and C) I love you, babygirl and will be back in an hour or two.”

*poof* dark cloud. Blaine was gone.

“Yeah, I love you too, bye honey..” I sighed, well aware he would not hear it.


“Ah, Blaine, who did you kill this time?” Caleb grinned as he beckoned Blaine inside.
“Nobody, but I may kick some ass here. What the hell is with that vampire council shit, just because the Mafioso knocked up his wife and turned her?!” Blaine told Caleb as they were getting seated in his living room.

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“I see, so he sent you.” Caleb stated drily.
“Yeah, right, you know me, his wish is my command. Have we met?” Blaine retorted.
“So why exactly are you here then?”
“To tell you to not get the council involved.”
“Ok, just to play along with this for a second, on what grounds would I overlook that new transgression after I literally just let you get away with murder?”
“On ground of that it is bullshit.” Blaine said, matter-of-factly.09-06-18_5-38-35 PM.png
“Blaine, it is a rule, a law and it was broken. My hands are tied.”
“Then untie them. Caleb, really, this is crap! A big pile of steaming crap.”
“Ok, so you speak to me as an old friend but want me to take action as the Elder? You really need to make up your mind Blaine. And why do you care so much anyway? I thought you did not like him?”
“I like his wife. And I am a father myself. As are you. How would you feel if you made an honest mistake, after a very traumatic event, where you could have lost your soulmate? They didn’t mean to break code, and with all the children they already have, I am pretty sure they didn’t plan to have another. At least one would hope.”
“That’s why we are to test, no matter what, before we turn someone.”
“I didn’t exactly have Vik piss on a stick before turning her! Kinda would have ruined the mood.”
“And that makes things better, how?”
“It proves that we are all … well.. human in a vampire way. Are you going to tell me that YOU had Grace take a pregnancy test when you turned her?”
“We actually did.”
“Were you still holding it, dripping all over,  when you bit her or did you put it down on the counter first. Or could it be that you took a pregnancy test at some time before you turned her, maybe days before, meaning you could have snuck her some little Caleb in between, which COULD have knocked her up? OMG, wait I think that is EXACTLY what happened the night you turned her, even though we are to wait until AFTER they transformed. Oopsie! And yeah, your twins REALLY turned out to be scary monsters with super-powers, such as high-pitched screaming and jelly-fingerprints on the fridge. I think I even saw them chew with their mouths open once!” Blaine’s words dripped with sarcasm.

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“Ah, ok, well played Blaine, well played. I see where you are going with this. OK, fine, you got me. So what would you have me do, and please no Blainisms but something logical, preferably something that does not cost me my position as Elder.”
“Easy. Forget you know about it. Or just know he turned his wife and that he knocked her up, forget the timing. Just worry about my nerves and the prospect of more Mafioso kids. You could donate money to me, so Vik and I could take a vacation from them and their drama.” Blaine grinned, already knowing that he won this one.
“Why would I, I don’t have to live next door to them. And if you want a vacation, get a real job, you sucker. As for your request, fine, I’ll let them off the hook. Luckily I had not send message to the council yet. Now get out of my home you fuckface before I change my mind.”
They both stood up, and shook hands on it, then Blaine turned to walk out the front door. Almost to the mailbox Caleb called after him.
“Hey Cameron?!”
“I hope it’s twins – no – triplets!” Caleb laughed.
Blaine laughed and flipped him off.


“Soooo?” I asked when Blaine walked in. Why he sometimes teleported and sometimes walked was beyond me. I had asked him but only gotten typical Blaine responses.
“Text or call that cannelloni and tell him we’re coming over. Now.”
“Bad news or good?”
“Oh, I better discuss that with him. And Melissa.”
“Oh boy!”

I texted Ezio as we were already on our way. He was standing in the open door when we got there. After brief greetings all eyes were on Blaine, his facial expression had been motionless until now.

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09-06-18_6-16-50 PM.png“So, I spoke to Caleb…” dramatic pause. All three of us hung on every word.
“And?!” Melissa broke first. Blaine looked at her and cracked a smile.
“Aww, I cannot do that to you Lissa. It’s all good. No council. No nothing. You’re both off free, and that baby will be too. Or babies.”09-06-18_6-14-45 PM.png“No way! Blaine you are the best!!!” Melissa hugged him tight.09-06-18_6-14-52 PM.png

09-06-18_6-15-10 PMEzio smiled. Once Melissa released Blaine, Ezio hugged him, although a lot differently than she had.
Melissa and I ran off to the kitchen to celebrate. I scored Moscato, Mel just some sparkling cider. Sorry girl. You did that to yourself. Or Ezio did.

“Thank you, man, I don’t even know how to thank you for this. Again.”
“I do. Convince my wife to let me have a motorcycle.”
“I’ll buy you one. Any of them you like! Just point and it is yours! Two even!”
“Nahh, I’ll buy my own, but need to convince the ol’ girl over there to let me have it. That’s something you can work on, if you want to help.”
“Blaine, I am no magician.”
“Oh well, I’ll have to keep saving your ass for free then.” Blaine smirked at Ezio.
“Ouch. Ok, let me go talk to her. Maybe I can swing the vote after all. I already have an idea. Just need to get her alone.”
“Be my guest.”
Ezio came over to me asking for my opinion on some drafts he had for work. So I went with him into their office. Little did I know …
“So, what did you need me to look at?” I stood by the desk. 09-06-18_6-26-22 PM.png
“Nothing really. I needed to speak to you alone for a second. I need a favor. A big one.”
“Oh man, what kind of favor could I grant an Ezio Auditore? The man who has it all.”
I braced myself. This was gonna be good.09-06-18_6-23-30 PM.png

“See, Blaine has been really helpful to me and I really appreciate it so much, neither one of you would let me repay you in a monetary fashion, so I thought it would be nice to offer you a gift. If you accept it, Blaine will. Maybe a second vehicle, so you do not have to share the Golf all the time. It could need service and then you would be without a vehicle … So maybe another car, something simple, maybe another compact car .. or maybe even…”
I cut him off.
“…or maybe a motorcycle.”
“Yeah, that would be good too.”09-06-18_6-22-15 PM.png
I gave Ezio a look. THAT look.
“Not smooth enough, was it?” he looked like the kid caught with the hand in the candy jar.
“Just let him have it. It’ll be fun.”
“So, because you feel guilty, I am supposed to sacrifice my sanity, cos we both know once he has it, he will pester me to ride with him, right?”
“Why not? Could be fun. You are -ahem – edgy enough to possibly enjoy it.”
“Edgy? Fun? Ha, fun my ass! Why Ezio Auditore, the great business mogul, is fighting the – I am sorry what was it again? – punk’s battles with the wifey now?” I laughed loudly.
“Viktoria, come on, take one for the team, for old time’s sake.”
“Why? What do I have to do with any of this? I was just helping and now I am the sacrificial lamb?”
“Please, please … PREGO!”
“Fine. You owe me big time, Auditore! BIG BIG BIG time! And don’t think for a split-second that I will not call that favor in one day!”
He just hugged me and kissed my cheek. 09-06-18_6-25-28 PM.pngWould you like to guess what is now parked in our front yard?09-06-18_5-55-31 PM.png






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